Letter to my next boyfriend 💔💔💔
I know right now you’re wondering what the hell you’ve gotten yourself into. You’re wondering who/what exactly messed me up. You’re cursing the day you asked me to be yours. I do not blame you, to be honest. The truth is, it was a collaborative effort. So many people loved me wrongly and I don’t even know what’s right anymore. The person that was meant to be my hero, plunged the knife deep in me.
I’m sorry I’m this way. I’m sorry that I don’t believe it most times when you call me beautiful or say you love me. I’m sorry that I have insane mood swings over the littlest things. I’m sorry that I get scared and insecure about you leaving me. I’m sorry I let my emotions get the better of me when I’m hurt or passionate about a topic. I’m sorry that I am a broken mess. I’m sorry I keep looking at myself and pointing out all my insecurities. I’m sorry I don’t let you in into the crazy workings of my mind as I should. I’m sorry I try to shoulder it all and deal with all my issues myself.
I’m working on a better me. I’m learning to see myself how you see me. I’m learning to love myself how I want you to love me but above all, I’m learning to respect and trust myself how I want you to respect and trust me.
There are days you’d feel like throwing in the towel and moving on. Days you’d feel like I’m a hardheaded bull that never listens to anything. Days you’d feel like you should choose your sanity over it all. I can’t exactly tell you what to do but all I’ll say is, there’s a piece of sanity in every insanity. Just hang in there a little longer. I’m going to be the best version of myself I can possibly be. I can do it without your help but it certainly would be easier with it.
Thank you for sticking with me. I really hope we last till the end and I finally learn what genuine love is. Even if we don’t last till forever, be a huge part of my healing process.
-Lelo💔
😭😭😭
This piece is beyoutiful
Sorry, never starts fight, but it ends fights happily. I do hope your sorrish declaration of emotional assets in the court of public opinion will soothen the heart of your prospective boyfiends.
We are all damaged goods, hoping to be mended by another damaged person. My last relationship hurts every time I think about it. She was damaged and I promised her companionship through her healing process. However, I failed to deliver on my own end. I truly loved her, but then she was damaged beyond what I thought I could manage. She had her hopes in me and I betrayed her. I feel I damaged her more and sent her back into her cocoon. It hurts as hell and I wish I could go back in time and hold her hands through it all.
Vicky I personally think u re really great at this, your words are deep and relating ....it's a good one dear
Thoughts articulately captured. May the oil on your pristine head never run dry.